She’s a Man-eater

I’d really like to say that I am one…but it would be a bold-faced lie. Unless you accept the amount of creeps I tend to attract. I realize that there are some individuals out there who may not have it together and make silly comments because they don’t know any better, but it can’t be all of them.
For those not aware, I work at a coffee shop that is connected to a Metra Train station. This in itself is a clue as to why there is a heavy presence of weirdos. Train stations are like the glowing light to the strange; they are ever attracted to this area and fly close enough to get zapped over and over again.
Only working in this particular place for a little over 7 months, I am shocked that I have encountered such a high number of creeps already. Some of them are regulars and just have no shame. They return daily to wink and tell me “they’ll wait up for me,” when I’m closing; or they want to know my schedule so that we can have dinner on my day off; or would like to know why I won’t agree to go back to Jamaica with him to meet his family; or ask “what magic do I wield to make his caramel apple spice so delicious? It must be your sweet personality,” he says. I take it all with a grain of salt, because I’m pretty confident that most of these men don’t have jobs, or wives, or a filter, or any idea that I am at least 30-40 years their junior. None of these flattering floosies is ever that tall, dark, handsome man with the cushy salary and longing for a girlfriend to spoil. Nope these guys are fat, balding, a day behind their hygiene regime, topped off with crooked toothy grins.

Life’s a balance like that, so that one day you’ll appreciate the guy with the slight beer belly and good manners. Because that my friends is your knight in shining armor. And I doubt he travels by train.

Advertisements
Published in: on September 1, 2010 at 11:03 pm  Comments (1)  

The URI to TrackBack this entry is: https://blauisms.wordpress.com/2010/09/01/shes-a-man-eater/trackback/

RSS feed for comments on this post.

One CommentLeave a comment

  1. If the Jamaican isn’t above 40, bald, or a creep I’d say give him a try 🙂


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: