Crack Isn’t That Whack

No no, I’m not on the Whitney Houston/ Bobby Brown band wagon.  And by no means do I condone the use of cocaine stimulants.  I’m talkin’ butt cracks.  They are universal no matter their size, every person has one.  So this is a subject that everyone can relate to regardless of their religion, race or age.

While eating lunch today I overheard the bartender discussing her friends trip to Las Vegas.  Apparently whatever happens in Vegas stays there, but a camera did happen to make it back.  On this camera are pictures of butt cracks.  The snapshot of a butt crack on a sunburned tool with spiky hair.  A butt crack on a bouncer leaning down to assist a drunken patron with his own exposed butt crack out of the club.

Butt cracks tanning, butt cracks eating, butt cracks winning big at the craps table.

Why is it that we have so much shame associated with a part of our body that is dying to see the light of day.  Always trying to escape into the world and feel the free air.  With world population estimates nearing 7 billion that means there are just as many cracks thirsty for fresh air and 14 billion butt cheeks in this world.  This is a peaceful army of flesh that we need to grant freedom.  I am going to be the first to wave my freedom flag and unleash the crack!  Who’s with me?!


Published in: on April 20, 2011 at 12:28 am  Comments (1)  

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  1. Poop come out some parts of the butt crack some of the time, thats why we hide them. If there was no poop, there’d be no shame. Or maybe if we invented the perfect toilet paper.

    As it stands, I am keeping a vice-grip strangle hold on the freedom that my butt crack apparently wishes to attain. Until the Abraham Lincoln of butt cracks issues forth his Emancipation Proctamation it is just a sad but true reality of the world in which we live.

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